My 30 Day blog challenge, and Day 1

1) My current relationship

Well, I am married to my high school sweetheart, Thomas.  This is my second marriage, which most of you may not know.

Some background.......When I was 19, I met someone (online).  We communicated as friends online for a long time, and eventually had a long distance relationship.  This guy, Rich, was 13 years older than me, and this relationship was a thorn in my family's side from day one.  They disapproved, and felt that as a partner, he held no real positive elements to add to my life.  It took me 4 years to realize that.  In late 2004, Tom got in touch with me, and I realized that I was not only not very happy with Rich, but that I'd rather be with Tom.

There is no sugar-coating this story. Tom and I re-kindled our love for one another, and I left my ex because I was unhappy.  There were lots of other aspects of my relationship w/ Rich that made me unhappy - the age difference was creating more conflict.  He wanted to have kids, but at that time, I had no interest in having kids - especially with him. We had no mutual friends, and he resisted becoming a part of my family, and his family ...was just...dysfunctional.  And that dysfunction really shaped him, and how he interacted w/ women in his life.

Our divorce was finalized in 2005.  I keep no pictures of Rich in boxes, and my family (seemingly) has no evidence of his existence.  I let him keep all our wedding pictures, all of our furniture, our house, everything - I took the dog, my clothes, my car, my books.  I even gave away my wedding dress to my cousin's fiance in the Philippines.  I can't say I wish it had never happened - because my first marriage helped to shape the woman that I am today. 

Tom and I got married on my birthday, Feb. 16th, 2007 - spontaneously, at the Phoenix Court House.  (Romantic, I know.)  He was still in the Army, and in the time we were together, had been deployed to Iraq 3 separate times.  It was difficult, but we both knew it would be.

We welcomed Calvin Thomas Stanfield into our lives on April 13th, 2009.  He is our joy, our sunshine, our motivation to press through the difficult days, he is the best of the both of us.

Recently, Tom and I have been determined to really protect our family/relationship time.  It's easy to forget to take care of your relationship, and to begin taking one another for granted.  It's seriously too easy to do this, and it's a slippery slope that leads to disrespect, disregarding one another, and working separately towards your own goals, and not working in tandem as a team.